Girls take forever in the bathroom

Throughout the generations, there has been a sort of legend surrounding the girl’s bathroom. Everything from soda fountains to ornately furnished lounges has been rumored to be behind those sacred doors. For those men wondering about it, rest easy-the record is about to be set straight.

Contrary to popular belief, we go to the bathroom to actually use the facilities. Bathrooms are available for a reason, and we take full advantage of them. Beyond that, we use the room to talk about-well you. During dates or encounters with people we don’t quite know, we use our times in the bathrooms like huddles or a timeout from the conversation. We need an opportunity to review the highlights of the conversation: your shortfalls, our own inadequacies and the missed hail-Mary passes. Don’t worry though, because we also make sure to mention what we enjoy as well.

You may complain about the incredible amounts of time we spend in the bathroom, but keep in mind that we are multi-tasking. So just remember that, however long it has taken, it could have been longer. While we dish about the people outside the doors of this hallowed space, we are also primping. There are even times when we go to the bathroom to do just that-which is what the couches and chairs are for-so that we can talk and refresh ourselves with some expectation of privacy.

It may be upsetting that we are given this level luxury in the rest room, but ask yourself whether you could actually handle it. With your one-urinal-buffer rule and your “cone of silence,” would you want a space in the bathroom where you could talk?

For now, the mysteries surrounding the ladies’ room have been resolved. Consider the legend flushed.