Breaking News

In a move to help expand the campus, Eastern recently agreed to purchase both the Valley Forge Military Academy and Cabrini College campuses, after receiving generous donations from neighbors.

The new land will allow Eastern to continue to increase its number of programs and residence halls and create a new form of revenue for the University.

“One of our first projects for the new space at Valley Forge is to build an amusement park,” Vice President of Student Development Bettie Ann Brigham said.

“One of the main reasons we got the money for this expansion was to please the numerous wealthy families in the neighborhood,” she said. “We’re planning to call it Campolo World.”

The new park will feature attractions such as the Shane Claibourne Make-Your-Own-Clothing tent, the Red-Letter Roller Coaster, the Dr. Cherry-Go-Round, Whack-a-Goose and the Chancellor Hall Free Fall.

The main attraction will be the Hawkins Haunted Mansion, a remodeled and transformed Mayor House.

Eastern will absorb the Military Academy student population in an attempt to balance the male-female ratio on campus, but the campus will not house the former Cabrini students.

Instead, they will be offered jobs at the amusement park. The “Cabrini Carnies” will be offered $7.50 an hour for running the numerous attractions and cleaning up the extended campus. 

Comments are closed.